Tips For Raising Twins

I have a very dear friend that just broke the news that she is expecting her third child this coming September. Yesterday while on Facebook we struck up a conversation about her pregnancy. It went something like this.....

Her: Wow I really don't remember being this tired and unmotivated with my other pregnancies. This is ridiculous.

ME: That's because you are having a girl....lol!

Her: I like that answer :)

Friend #1: Twin girls? What?! ;)

Her: die

Friend #1: Oh thaaaats right, you wanted triplet girls. :D

Her: I mean I don't think I'd like twins :)

Me: Your twin girls can hang with my twin boys......bahahahaha


It went back and forth like that for a bit. Now she doesn't really know what she is having yet or if she is having twins, but it was fun joking back and forth. All the talk of twins did spur me to come up with a list of things I have learned while raising my twin boys. I'm no expert, just a typical mom making my way through life raising my children as best as I know how.

First, NEVER and I mean NEVER buy just one of a certain item. Whether it's a toy, t-shirt, plate, cup, blanket or any other thing you can think of, always buy two of the same thing. It never fails when one wants that plate with the race cars on it, the other wants the same thing. I have just learned that it is easier to have two on hand than to try to reason with a three year old. I'm sure when they get older I won't have to keep buying duplicates, but for the time being I am always on the lookout for those Buy One Get One deals on toddler items.

Second, when it comes to feeding during the first year, I highly recommend investing in a Boppy pillow and a good breast pump (if you are planning to breastfeed). I tried to keep my boys on the same feeding schedule so it didn't feel like I was always feeding. I had a pretty good set-up going for feeding time....one boy would get breast-fed and the other would get a bottle with breast milk. This is where the Boppy came in handy. I could hold one and lay the other in front of me on the pillow. Then the next feeding time I would switch who got the bottle and who didn't. It is possible to breastfeed both at the same time, but let's face it, no matter how much I wanted to be Supermommy, it just wasn't happening for me.

Third, be prepared for separation anxiety. I found that my boys can't go anywhere without the other one in tow. After all they did spend 9 months curled up together inside my womb and it's only natural that they always want to be together. I can't even run to the grocery store with just one of them. It's either they both go or they both stay home with daddy.

Next, potty train at the same time. As soon as one shows signs that he/she is ready, get the other one on board with the plan. I just couldn't see stressing myself and my boys out by dragging the whole process out twice. And besides they learn from each other anyway....

And lastly, my biggest piece of advice would be don't sweat the small stuff. Raising twins shouldn't be an anxiety invoking ordeal. It really isn't any more difficult other than the fact that there are two children and a little more noise.

 

I absolutely love being a mommy of these handsome 3 year old twin boys! 



Toilet Time- How I Potty Trained Twin Boys

I was about done with changing diapers and decided it as time to start thinking about how to potty train my twin boys. I had potty trained my other two children, but it was not at the same time and did not know here to begin for the boys. Do I train them together? Do I train them separately? Was I even ready to take on the challenge of potty training? I had no idea. So I started to do some research on how to train twins. What I found was, since each child is different, there are no real set of directions to potty training a child let alone how to train two of them.

The one thing I did find to successfully potty training is to make sure each child is ready. I told myself it was ok if one was ready and the other just wasn't. Each child will eventually get the hang of using the toilet, it just takes some patience. I looked for things like:

1. Staying dry for extended periods of time. It shows some bladder control.
2. Showing an interest in bathroom rituals. For example following me whenever I went or wanting to flush after going.
3. Starting to be aware that they are wet or have pooped.
4. The ability to use words to describe bodily functions.

Each of my children were ready at about 2 1/2-3 years old. Quite a few articles I had read regarding potty training in general stated that some children are ready as early as 18 months. If you believe your child is ready that early then by all means go ahead and try. In my opinion, that isn't old enough. I knew that if I tried to soon I would only end up frustrating myself and the boys. I don't believe a child fully understands these type of things until they are closer to 3 years old.

With my twin boys, they were 3 years and one month old when I potty trained them. I think one of them was ready a lot sooner than that, but since they do everything together I decided to wait until they were both ready. Neither of them have learned to be independent of each other yet and did not want to force it with potty training. I thought potty training them together would make things go smoother and they could learn from each other.

Potty Training In 3 Days or Less talks about how to accomplish it over a weekend. I decided to set 5 days aside where we did nothing but focus on potty training since there were two children instead of just one. I didn't think the weekend was a good choice for us so I chose to use the weekdays. This way my other two children were at school for the majority of the day thus cutting down on distractions.

Before we could begin our journey to being diaper less, I had to come up with some ways to make it fun for the twins. I read about using sticker charts and doing a potty dance. I didn't think they would work well for my boys. Try to do something that your child truly enjoys to make potty training more appealing. I decided that since my boys both loved jelly beans and Dum Dum suckers that they would act as their rewards. Each time they put pee pee in the potty they would get a jelly bean. And each time they put poo poo in the potty they would get a Dum Dum sucker. We were also going to include grandma and grandpa in the process. The first time each of my boys used the toilet on their own they were going to be able to make a special phone call to whatever grandparent they chose so they could brag about their accomplishment.

Awhile back I purchased an Elmo's Potty Time DVD. For the week prior to our 5 days of no diapers we started each morning watching it and talking about how going potty on the toilet means you're growing up to be a big boy. And each time I went to use the toilet I would take them with me. This way I could show the twins how to use the toilet correctly. I would make each of them also go with my husband so they could see how boys stand and pee pee. He was going to be in charge of teaching to pee standing up. At the end of that week I felt we were finally ready to start the path to diaper freedom.

Day One

We woke up and had breakfast. While eating I explained to my twins that we were not going to wear any diapers today, but instead going to put our pee pee and poo poo in the potty. I also explained that for the entire day they were going without any bottoms on. I made sure I kept supplying juice and water so they would have to go frequently. We took turns every 15 minutes sitting on the potty. The first few times were mainly to get used to sitting there. About the third time sitting on the potty my first twin finally started to go. He immediately jumped up screaming "I'm going pee pee!" as pee was going everywhere. I was so proud of him that I didn't mind only half of it made it in the toilet. Like I said there are no set of directions to potty training. I was just glad that he realized pee pee belongs in the potty. Moments later the second twin was going, too. Finally, I knew our days of diapers were over. They both got to make their phone calls once we were through. We continued with the rest of our morning going to the bathroom every 15 minutes until lunchtime.

We had lunch and I praised them both for doing such a good job all morning long. Neither one had a single accident and I thought it was time to wait a little longer between bathroom trips. After lunch we started going every half hour instead of every 15 minutes. I wanted to try to teach them how to control their bladder. I continued to keep filling them with juice and water throughout the rest of the afternoon. They both seemed to be getting it like a pro as long as I was taking them every 30 minutes. The real test is going to be later in the week when we aren't going to the bathroom as often.

I stopped letting the boys have anything to drink right around dinner time. I wanted to start making them go to bed with an empty bladder so there would be no accidents at night. After dinner we made one more trip to the bathroom and got ready for bed. I put them in training pants to sleep in and put them to bed. We had made it through our first day! I could not believe how well being diaper-free was going.

Day Two

Day two went pretty much like day one. We spent the day without any bottoms on and drank a lot of juice and water. During the morning time we made our trip to the bathroom every half hour. After lunch we increased our potty time to every hour. This is where I found my twins started to have accidents. Accidents are unavoidable and should be expected. Don't forget I was still giving them much more to drink than what they are normally used to. When one twin had an accident I just made sure I explained that pee pee/poo poo belonged in the toilet. I then had whoever had the accident help me clean it up. I never once said "it's ok" or "don't worry about it" because I did not want to condone soiling themselves, but I also did not scold them either. Scolding for having an accident would only discourage your child and possibly cause you to lose all the progress already made toward being done with diapers permanently. Instead simply just reinforced what we have been practicing. Let's face it, practice does make perfect.

Day Three

By day three my twins were beginning to realize when they had to go on their own. We started the morning off by going straight to the bathroom. Let me explain here that I never carried the potty chair all over the house during the whole potty training process. All the articles I read and all the advice I was given said to have the potty seat everywhere your child was at. I believe that either way would work, but I wanted my twins to get in the habit of going into the bathroom to use the toilet.

Throughout the rest of the day I slowly increased the time between potty breaks and gradually went back to their normal amount of drinks until it finally happened.......my first twin disappeared into the bathroom all by himself! I was so excited that my little boy was growing up! And by the end of the day both of my boys were telling me they had to use the toilet.

Day Four

Since the past three days went so well, I decided to venture out to let my twins pick out some big boy undies. After breakfast was over, I got the boys ready for our trip to Target. I put them in training pants just in case. I didn't want to get stuck at the store alone trying to change one child and keep the other one occupied at the same time. I decide that was a challenge I wanted to take on when my husband was with me.

One last trip to the bathroom and we were off. Even though I am a shopping goddess, I knew our first time away from home had to be a short trip. We made it to Target and went directly to the toddler section. I was proud of myself....I even walked completely past the dollar section that grabs me every time I enter the store. When we found the undies, I let each boy pick out their own package. The first twin chose a package of Elmo print while the other twin chose Thomas the Train. Big boy undies were a huge deal and I was glad I finally didn't have to ever buy diapers again.

We went directly home where I put their new undies in to be washed so they could be worn later in the day. Much to my surprise both boys made it home completely dry. While we waited for their undies to finish, we had lunch and continued practicing using the toilet.

The rest of the day was spent running around in nothing but their new undies. You could see the excitement in each of their eyes. They must have tried on every single pair just because they could. While there were a few accidents, I was proud that both boys had made the transition out of diapers and into underwear.

 

Day Five

I planned for five days, but I really only needed four. I spent this last day reinforcing everything I had taught them the last four days. There were accidents along the way, but we just rolled with the punches and carried on. After all it's only been a few days since we quit wearing diapers cold turkey.


Yeah! With the help of my husband, I had potty trained two boys! On occassion we still use training pants if we know we are going to be away from home for an extended period of time. I don't think my boys really need them, I think it is more for piece of mind for me. Soon days of shopping in the baby section will be a thing of the past for us except for the occassional baby shower gift.

Temper Tantrum Troubles

When raising a family there are good days and there are bad days. Today would be one of those bad days.......

It started with a knock at my door right around the time the sun was peeking in through the bedroom window. I arose from my slumber to see who in their right mind would be interrupting my much needed sleep. To my surprise it was an employee from the electric company informing me they needed to inspect the poles in my yard. Really? Was it necessary to wake me at the break of dawn just to climb a pole to make sure it was working properly? I just nodded to the man and waved him off with a gigantic yawn.

I preceeded to climb back into bed when I heard an unfamiliar noise coming from my yard. What now? I jumped back out from under my big, brown, fuzzy blanket to go investigate what was going on. It was the electric company employee at the top of the pole with a chainsaw clearing branches away from the lines leading to my house. Now I was getting annoyed. Not only did he wake me, but now he was going to wake the twins.

Before I could find my shoes and make it out the front door to protest all the noise, I heard a faint "momma" come from the same room I just exited. Great! It was Thing 1 waking from the strange noise. When Thing 1 wakes, Thing 2 is usually not far behind. My day was really starting off on the right foot. NOT!

The twins both followed me out to the living room like little ducklings waddling after their momma duck. Both grumpy from being woke up a bit too early and saggy diapers begging to be changed, I decided that some Wiggly Waffle is just what they needed. I went on the great remote hunt that I find myself doing every morning so I could tune into PBS Sprout for a dose of silly songs and cartoons.

After diapers were changed and boys were dressed, it was time to find something they would both eat for breakfast. This is where it gets tricky having twins....one wants eggs while the other wants yogurt. That is until you give one eggs and the other yogurt. It always seems one wants what the other has.

Here comes tantrum #1&2.....

Thing 1 decided that he no longer wanted his eggs and wanted the yogurt Thing 2 had. He quickly swapped his eggs for the yogurt he wanted and it sent Thing 2 into a full blown tantrum. I tried to step in and give Thing 1 another yogurt, but he did not want the one I was offering, he wanted the one he had just swiped from his brother. Now not only was Thing 2 kicking and screaming, but now Thing 1 was in a full blown tantrum. It sounded like the world was coming to an end right in my kitchen. The yogurt they both wanted so badly went sailing through the air and with a splat landed right in the middle of the kitchen floor. With both boys screaming and crying I went into mommy mode; I scooped them both up and went to the table. We sat down together and had a talk about how we all needed to share. At this age I can't be sure of how much my boys comprehended what I was saying, but I at least was trying to instill good morals in them and eventually they would stick. When the last sniffle was gone and the last cry let out, we shared what little bit of the yogurt was left.

Breakfast finished and the boys quietly playing with their cars in the living room, it was now time for me to start my housework. I gathered up all the laundry strewn about my older kiddos' floors and tossed a quick load in the washer. Next I washed, dried and put the breakfast dishes away. With the wash going and the kitchen clean, it was time for what I like to call a little computer therapy. I checked my email to see if hubby had written, logged into Facebook and opened my blog. I spent the next half hour catching up on what was going on in the world outside.

LUNCHTIME! My favorite time of the day...it means time for the boys to eat then take a nap. Well on any normal day that is how things go in my household except for today. Neither of the boys wanted anything to do with eating what I made for them. In fact, Thing 1 decided it would be fun to see if his pb&j sandwich would fit in the vcr! What a mess that made!

Here comes tantrum #3.....

Thing 1 is not happy that mommy just cleaned up what he worked so hard at making a mess. Instant meltdown smack in the middle of the living room floor. This one I was just going to let him work out on his own. There comes a time when you just have to walk away and ignore the behavior and this was it.  After about 20 minutes of screaming and kicking the floor, he finally realized mommy wasn't paying any attention to his madness and he quickly stopped.

Patiently waiting for my middle child to arrive home from school, I packed the twins up and got ready to make the dreaded trip to Walmart. My daughter had so kindly left me little yellow sticky notes all over the house prior to her leaving for school reminding me she needed a flash drive for her school project. As soon as Bubba arrived, we headed out to pick up LouLou's item she needed for school.

Here comes tantrum #4.....

Have you ever noticed that when you want to get in and get out quick, it never happens? I was just going in for a few groceries and a flash drive. Bubba had other ideas. Apparently he assumed that just because we were going to the store it meant that he was going to get a toy. He begged and pleaded all the way through the store for that toy he just had to have. When actually he would play with it for about two days and never pick it up again. I even got, "mom, I promise to behave if you buy me this." Nope, I was sticking to my guns, he was not getting another toy. Well he threw such a fit in the check-out that I wanted to find the closest exit and quickly escape the pure embarrassment he just caused.

Safely at home, it was time for dinner., bath and bed. Thank goodness this day was finally over and I owe it all to the early wake up call from the electric company!

The Beginning

This is my first attempt at blogging so bear with me as I get the hang of it. I guess I should start out by telling you a little about me. I am a military spouse and mother of four beautiful children. My oldest is 12 who really thinks she is going on 21. We'll talk more about her later. Then there would be my middle child who is almost 10. He is what you would call my "difficult" one. Just one year ago he was diagnosed with ADHD and it has been an ongoing struggle for him. Last but not least there are my sweet 2 year old twin boys. Man are they a handful at this age. I have been married to a wonderful man for going on 10 years. We have had our ups and downs, but we are in it for the long haul. I currently call Florida home for as long as the Army lets us or until we decide we have had enough moving and decide to stay permanently here.

I hope through my experiences that I can enlighten other women and create a fun and safe place to air our frustrations. Being a woman with many titles is not just demanding, but tiring. Not only are we expected to be mom, but also taxi driver, nurse, housekeeper, accountant, teacher, chef and counselor.  We as women do all those things for the love of our family, expecting nothing in return. With this in mind, I think I'll go pour myself a glass of wine and begin to unwind from a long day.

Stay tuned for more about me and my wacky family.....